counting down..........

time is going quickly -the surgery is fast approaching ... I really have peace about it things are coming together very well i feel like I am prepared to go into this ... not sure if I will start freaking out tomorrow or Thursday,,, I still have Jen's Christmas to finish up and my pain meds to get lined up - called the surgeon's nurse today to discuss it,.. told her if I don't have the meds I will be staying at the hospital... lol So how do I REALLY feel inside? At peace I know God is in control of this whole thing He will see me thru it all. good bad or indifferent... lol

Got food things lined up now just trying to stay out of the temptation to have a "last" anything...

have been thinking about banana bread and other things that are NOT on my program..."comfort" food... yeah.......

Dear Lord...please be my comfort in this time please fill the hole that is craving comfort. Fill ME Lord with your goodness and love .

like a crazy woman!!

I've been moving like a crazy woman these last days ...trying to get Christmas bought and things cleaned and straightened and my food under control and keep up my exercise and wow by the time I have this surgery I will need to just lay around to recover from all of this!!

It has been weird to be buying Chiristmas before Thanksgiving and it will be even weirder to have it all wrapped and under the tree and the house all decorated before DEC 1st!

but get it done I must and will!!!

Josh and Lauren Engagement pictures... by me...

I shot Josh and Lauren's engagement pictures...I think I did a pretty good job...and she liked them sooo hey batting 2 for 2!! We shot at the Art Museum it was iffy with their new photog policy in effect...but hey the worst they would do is throw us out!! And that didn't happen! So here are the pics enjoy!

ok this one was just for fun!!

Happy Birthday to ME!

yup it's my birthday gonna party ...it's my birthday ..gonna party...lol

nahhh not really just happy with the blessings I have in this life and so grateful to my friends and family.

It is a beautiful November day out so going to grab my ipod and take a nice fast long walk get in a little extra exercise today and count my blessings . I am on the move to get things done before my upcoming surgery I have started the Christmas shopping and have been cleaning up my little messes in the closets and storage room ect... Next thing will be cleaning the house good . you know really cleaning it not just the surface but deep clean! Maybe get my hubby to get the windows all cleaned!

God is speaking into my life on so many things it is hard sometimes to wrap my brain around His goodness and His care of me! I am so pleased that I am able to please Him thru my abstinence that I am able to worship Him without the specter of the addiction looming over me standing between Him and me .

I am looking out the window and seeing the trees that are the color of Topaz which is my birthstone color and realizing that these warm oranges and deep yellows and reds are the colors of my soul... the only thing missing is the purples!! But as I look at the colors and read all the birthday messages today my heart is overflowing with love and gratitude of my friends and my family. And I do truly miss the ones who are missing . I pray for him and his family today - that they will find reconciliation with God and within our family. My heart grieves for his soul and I pray for him daily - but I know it is not anything I can do . He needs to come to the saving reconciliation of Christ in his life . I grieve that he is not a Christian and pray he comes to Christ.

So for today tho I am making my gratitude my attitude ! I am abstinent today by the Grace of God the strength of Jesus being my everything and the fellowship I share in OA

Happy 51st birthday to me!