rainy day thoughts

looking out the window into the dreary grey rainy day hearing the low rumble of thunder it is comforting to be inside curled up on the couch with my lap top and the peace and quiet of the house.

Thinking about my life thinking about where I am going in these next years of my life as Jen is heading into her senior year. My email name will be changing I suppose ... thebizymom will not be so busy in the coming years!And while it is sad to see my babies growing up and I miss those moments of toddler tickles and laughs -it is awesome to see the young men and women they are becoming.

So what about me who shall I be in this next stage of my life? where will God use me? I have friends who have gone to school... I don't see that for me-not that I am stupid but really,,due to the realities of my life I missed so much of school when i was there that to go back to school...I am just not feeling it!

Photographer...cake lady...organiser... comedian are all things that people tell me I should be! ha seriously all I ever wanted to be was a mom..a wife ..someone who can make a difference in someones life-

I guess the key to being happy and successful in this next phase of my life is to listen to God... to be still ... and REALLY listen to Him. He knows what He wants for me for my life...I need to seek Him and listen.

........................................................................shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....................................................

the life of an addict

yeah seeing commercials for the show intervention... how alcoholics & drug addicts have people intervene to save them...from a certain death . Yet millions of obese people are offered more more more food everyday....by well meaning loving family and friends...no interventions...and just as certain death.

Why is it no one thinks to ask the obese person if there's a problem they just assume that they have no will power that if they had a little bit of control they could whip this problem and lose the weight.

They have no clue how the food obsession works in a food addicts brain how the addicts brain can't stop thinking about everyday items such as brownies cakes cookies how one taste of sugary treats can send one off on a binge . How even one bite can trigger weeks of obsession - how the smell of cookies the sight of cake in the kitchen and you can't concentrate all you see or think about is how can you eat it. To know you are powerless over a sweet.

An alcoholic can go out to eat and there is no alcohol... a drug addict can go out to eat and no drugs,,,a food addict goes out to eat and there it is something sweet something gooey something that will stay in your mind in your dreams for weeks if you eat even a nibble....

Please -stop allowing your family and friends to kill themselves....stop helping them stop offering them the knife , fork and spoon to do it with.

life on the road..

we leave tomorrow for Shipshewanna to see pie ,the flea markets and auction and shops and pie and did I mention there's gonna be pie there???

yeah as an addict addicted to sugar that leaves pie out of my vacation equation - and the Amish do not do the whole picture thing so there goes my camera fun.... sighhh they better have the booths with the designer perfumes... thats all I am saying

and really I might snap a picture or 2 of the Amish...and if I do there better not be a ruckus coz I am not eating any pie!!! LOL

Jen is going with us she has never been there and we haven't really ever been on vacation with just her...she isn't taking a friend so it is just us I think it will be nice!

grateful girl rambling...

I am a grateful girl yes indeed!
nothing big has happened in fact in this food addiction I am struggling - in this pain I am struggling - but for right now this day this minute ..
I am grateful! To my Lord. He has done so much for me in my life and continues to even when I am not so grateful.

I read the book Heaven is for real---it was very good and warmed my heart- made me remember my healing journey with Jesus- wow If you haven't read the book then get it read it-it was a quick 2 hour read- easy writing- and the story is one that while it is easy to read there is a lot to ponder in it. I will probably read thru it again just to delight in his descriptions of heaven.

Do i believe it? you betcha! it was chilling at times his descriptions...so pure - and his insistence that Jesus loves children...and that you have to be saved to go to Heaven -
Jesus loving the children.... yes indeed He does! After reading the book my heart is filled to overflowing with His love for me for us-

He held her little hand
as she walked thru the life drama
He held her small face
as she cried about the sexual trauma
He lifted her up and held her tight
As the healing journey's end was in sight
He sat her down and said it is done
as she and the woman merged into one.
He holds her bigger hand....
ks2011©