oh Lord please take from me this stupid addiction which creates an IDOL in my life.
yesterday as I was sitting idly around just watching TV when i have a list of things to do I became obsessed with peanut m&ms.,..now what you may or may not know about me is I am a Hershey's chocolate eater peanut m&ms are good but not my favorite...yet there were those Girl Scout camps that I always had peanut M&Ms in my pocket coz...well they just didn't melt like a Hershey bar would!! LOL
Now this is the insane part of this disease...I am working on 12 months of food abstinence,,,from Sugar and compulsive eating WHY would I break that for a food that is NOT my favorite??? To me this is the CRAZY part of this,
SO back to yesterday I was thinking I would just go to the store and buy a small bag of course my mind was not seeing any bags smaller then a pounder bag and frankly even that-- had I cracked that nut --would NOT have been big enough.
That's just it with this food addiction never is there enough. not one bite not one small bag not a pounder bag,,,it will never EVER be enough.
How does this translate into an IDOL? You know like those talked about in Exodus and Isaiah...well it is because I am feeling anxiety and discomfort and at odds within myself and I am seeking something outside of GOD out side of Jesus whom I claim to be my LORD ...for comfort.
I am looking to my IDOL of food to comfort me to sooth my feelings...
Smashing that IDOL on the side of the road... seeing HIM as my LORD and never food....
Thank you Lord Jesus for your love and your patience .
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