Monday, August 08, 2011

after 21 years...

wow today is my last "first day of school" day! I've done 1st days since 1990...when Jes started pk 3 - every fall has been bitter sweet...sending my child then children and now back to child off on the first day of school... 21 years of firstdays .

My life is about to totally change and I'm not sure what that means for me or what it should look like after this year with Jen graduating in 2012...
I've been thebizymom for so many years yet these last few have slowed down a bunch I still have job security with Laundry to do lunch and dinners to make ... a kid to get out the door on time and a house that stays messy when she is here!

So as the year progresses the questions come...whats Jen gonna do next year and what are YOU going to do next year... good question and one I do not have to think about today...for today I am just gonna be in today.

And today there is sadness that this last chapter of child raising is in the beginning stages of coming to a close and just for today I will feel the sadness as it hits and not try to bury it or eat it or deny my sadness at my babies growing up . And there is joy too for getting this far ! It was so hard to imagine this day 13 years ago when Jen started Pk 3 and life then was crazy with 4 kids at home and school starting and sports and scouts and sleepovers and all the wonderful things that came and went in the years of kid raising.

just for today I am gonna smile at the memories cry at the memories and look forward to living this year in the present.

Thank you Lord for the healing touch you give



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